We’ve been paired together for a very important project, and it’s due soon, but we haven’t worked on it yet because you keep flaking on me. You’re a Freshman, college is still new to you, and things keep coming up. But I’ve been around for awhile, since this is my last year, and I don’t have the patience for that. When we finally do get together to work, you’re distracted, and it turns out that the college experience hasn’t quite been what you were hoping for. You keep striking out with the girls you want to hook up with, and you’re so frustrated, it’s making you unable to focus. It looks like I’m going to have to take care of your problem myself, just so we can get our fucking work done…

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